Why Many Women are Not Easily Satisfied During Sex

The assumption in the street is that women are difficult to be satisfied in bed. Women most often blame the men for this. They accuse men of impatience, lack of romance and not engaging in foreplay long enough. Some women even go as far as complaining about the size of the penis of their partners.

However, there could be many reasons why women are not easily satisfied during sex. Some of these factors include the disposition of mind, what they feel about their partner, their enthusiasm, hormonal changes and other physical and emotional elements.

Cleveland Clinic Health Essentials listed 5 reasons women don’t enjoy sex and how to overcome it.

These factors include: Stress: Stress can do a number on your libido, Dr. Batur says. Pain: “Pain during sex is like a flashing neon sign telling you something’s wrong,” Dr. Batur says. Common causes of painful sex include: pelvic floor dysfunction. This common condition occurs when muscles in the base of the pelvis don’t relax normally. Women with pelvic dysfunction often have painful intercourse.

Hormonal changes: Changing levels of oestrogen and testosterone can lead to painful sex. Women who are breastfeeding or entering menopause may have hormonal changes that cause vaginal dryness and a burning sensation with intercourse. In some cases, hormonal treatments can correct the problem.

Other medical causes: There are other possible causes of vaginal pain, including infections and endometriosis: “Depending on the problem, you might want to see a certified menopause specialist or a specialist in sexual health to get to the bottom of it,” Dr. Batur says.

Psychological causes: “Underlying anxiety or depression can get in the way of your sex drive,” Dr. Batur notes. Issues such as relationship troubles or a history of sexual trauma can also affect your interest in physical intimacy.

In such cases, a mental health professional can help you work through the underlying difficulties.

Low libido: Sometimes, a sluggish sex drive is a matter of mindset. “A lot of women have what’s known as responsive desire — you might not be that interested in initiating sex, but once you get into it, you realize, ‘Hey, this is fun,’” Dr. Batur says. “Sometimes, you just need to go with the flow and let your brain catch up.”

But sometimes, it’s not enough to fake it till you make it. Some women have a low sex drive in the absence of any other underlying problem. This is called hypoactive sexual desire disorder (HSDD). Another term that’s used is female sexual interest/arousal disorder. Your doctor can prescribe medications that can help put you in the mood.

Trouble with arousal orgasm: If sex just doesn’t feel great, start with a refresher course in sex ed, Dr. Batur explains. “Lots of women think they should be able to climax with intercourse, but many — maybe even most — women need external stimulation to to reach orgasm.”

Another reason why Nigerian women may not enjoy sex is because of one factor. Men have variously complained that their partners are usually reluctant to criticise a sexual performance and are timid to say their sexual preferences; that even in marriage some women clam up.

“They may complain to their fellow women whom they share confidentialness but they will never tell you.”

“I took me time to know that my wife wanted me to have longer foreplay. Not just foreplay; but to just be normal with her as if we are not going to do anything. We may just be talking and I will be touching her while we talk. But I am usually very careful to bring topics that will make her laugh or romantic and as we continue to talk and I am touching her, she will then cross one of her legs across mine. Then I will know she is ready. That is when I will start the foreplay proper. I just stumbled on this strategy because she never told me, until after we did it the first time. She just mumbled, I like the way you did it last night. That is after 10 years of marriage!