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Deceased Ikechukwu

How Lesbianism is Gaining Traction and Eroding Societal Values in Nigeria

Deceased Ikechukwu

Nick Udenta

The story is already rife how a lady killed a staff of the College of Health in Onitsha, known as Ikechukwu Onuma, stabbing him to death with a knife.

Initial report by THISDAY Newspapers indicated that the man, who was simply identified as Ikechukwu, came home on Tuesday night (August 9, 2022) to behold his wife in bed with another woman.

His wife, unknown to him was a lesbian, and had been keeping a female sex partner. On catching them in the act, sources said the lady quickly attacked the man with a kitchen knife, stabbing him to death, after an argument ensued.

“The news has been everywhere in Onitsha today. People are so surprised how Ayaaya (Ikechukwu’s nickname) was killed.

“He was a very handsome guy, and he is an admin staff at the college. How his wife left such a handsome young man to become a lesbian to the point of bringing sexual partners to the house is still a wonder.”

Another Respondent, Mrs. Uju said: “Ikechukwu is a very popular guy in the neighborhood. He is also known as “Onye Obodo”. He got married to the lady in 2019.”

Meanwhile, police authorities in Anambra State have confirmed the incident, saying that the lesbian partner has been arrested.

The Spokesperson of the Anambra State Police Command, DSP. Toochukwu Ikenga, said: “We have a suspect in custody and the Commissioner of Police, CP. Echeng Echeng, has ordered immediate transfer of the case to State CID for a proper investigation.

“Preliminary information shows that the suspect stabbed the victim on the chest. He was rushed to the hospital before he was confirmed dead by the doctor on duty.

“What brought about the suspect’s action has not been ascertained, meanwhile investigation has just begun.”

THISDAY also reported that the incident happened at about 9:20 p.m. at the deceased residence, along Ogboli Road, Onitsha.

Update

However, Daily Post in a follow up report stated that more facts emerged about the stabbing to death of Ikechukwu Onuma.

The medium reported that upon extensive investigation, that contrary to reports in the media, the man did not catch his wife red-handed with the suspected murderer in a sexual act.

Findings showed instead that Ikechukwu, young staff of the College of Health, Onitsha, who was in his mid-30s, and had just been married for three years, was also aware that his wife was a lesbian.

A source, Mr. Sam Eze from inland town Onitsha, where the couple lived said, “Ayaya (Ikechukwu’s nickname) knew his wife was a lesbian.

“Yes, but on the day he died, he didn’t catch them in the act. A different altercation arose and he had to go to the lady’s house to sort it out. An argument followed up and she threatened to kill him if he didn’t leave.

“He stood his ground and the lady went in to get a knife. On coming out, he dared her to do her worst and after a scuffle, she stabbed him twice in the chest.”

Eze continued, saying, “Mind you, the whole town knows that both ladies are lesbians and lovers. The late man had even sent her (his wife) packing before over the same issue.

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“The killer too was married before but her husband divorced her because of her lesbianism.”

Further investigation by Daily Post also revealed that after Ikechukwu warned the lesbian partner to stay away from his wife, and the wife adhered to his instructions to dump her, she (lesbian partner) started tormenting the family.

A neighbour to the deceased man in a now deleted Facebook post claimed the supposed lesbian lover was fond of dispossessing the maid to the deceased of any money she was sent on errands with.

“They sent the ward to buy fuel (on that fateful day) and the killer collected the money as usual. The ward came back and told the wife and the wife called the husband that was busy at a party to come home.

“When the guy came home she told him what happened, so the guy now went to the killer’s house to find out why she will collect the money from their ward not knowing that one was already waiting for him and a fight started and she stabbed him.”

She further added that, “The victim is a well-known and funny guy, so his death was a shock to a lot of people.

“The matter was that the wife and the killer are lesbian partners indeed, but they were not caught in the act in the bedroom as rumoured.

“The dead guy has been warning the killer to stay away from the wife because both of them are partners, and he warned the wife too. Because of the said beef, whenever the dead guy sends their ward to go and buy something the lesbian killer will block the ward on the road and collect the money they gave the ward.”

The lesbians (money central)

Lesbianism as New Behaviour in Nigeria

A lesbian is a woman who is physically and romantically attracted to other women. Lesbianism is a form of homosexuality.

The first mention of lesbianism in history is in the Code of Hammurabi, a Babylonian code of laws from around 1700 B.C. that allowed women to marry each other.

The word “lesbian” comes from the name of the Greek island Lesbos, where Sappho was born. She was an ancient Greek woman who wrote poems that included homosexual themes. The term “sapphic,” named for this poet, also refers to female homosexuality.

Lesbians may also refer to themselves as gay women or simply as gay.

In years past, “queer” was a derogatory term used toward lesbians, gay people, and others in the LGBTQ community. But some younger members of the community have reclaimed the term. Some lesbians may identify as queer. In general, queer simply means someone who isn’t straight.

Sun newspapers report of April 1, 2020 stated that across Nigeria, mostly in urban centers, rings of women seeking women for love and sex are booming. In Lagos, Port Harcourt and Enugu, these rings are fast metamorphosing into burgeoning communities and are hardly distinct from your everyday bisexual prostitution rackets.

It reported that operational modules include physical approaches and contacts through social media, especially Facebook messenger, Whatsapp, Instagram,etc. In fact, Social media presently accounts for more than 62% of the boom in the trade according to statistics obtained by Daily Sun in Lagos. A sample of most of those interviewed who are not lesbians but who nonetheless, have been approached for lesbian acts confirms the statistics. Bimbo Talabi (real names withheld), 21, a beautician residing in the Surulere area of Lagos disclosed that her Messenger platform has at least six inter –exchanges weekly with lesbians seeking for her love and eventual sex. One of the messages which she displayed reads: “ Hi bae”

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“Can you find time this evening or tomorrow morning to meet me at Cason hotel (Bar)

And she promptly dispatches sexually explicit nude pictures of herself in self-fondling of breasts and genitals ( 3 in a row)

“From an act that was done in the exclusivity of darkness and hidden from public glare, lesbianism in Nigeria has assumed a liberal proportion where even matchmaking as an added incentive is made and nurtured. Hook –up takes the shape of the normal male- female love entangles, except that in most cases lesbians are faster, without regards to any considerations of physical attractions, compatibility or dressing. The supposed husband in a lesbian relationship showers the wife with gifts and love while the wife respects her and shows undiluted commitment to the affair.

“In Nigeria, Lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender (LGBT) are constrained  because of legal and social challenges. Nigeria does not recognize or allow their rights. There is no legal protection against discrimination. Culture and social mores prohibit it. Very few of them are open about their orientation, and violence, and stigmatization against them are frequent. For instance, Edafe Okporo fled Nigeria to the United States of America, USA to seek asylum based on his sexual orientation and was granted political asylum in 2017,” the paper reports.

It also reported that many other Nigerian lesbians are also fleeing to countries with better protection in laws. A review of the 2007 Pew Global Attitudes Project shows that 97% of Nigerians believe that lesbianism is a way of life that must not be accepted. In 2015, a survey by an organization founded by a Nigerian homosexual activist based in London claimed this percentage has reduced to 94%. However, Bisi Alimi , a self – acclaimed homosexual says  Nigerians who agree that they should receive education ,healthcare, and housing is a mere 13%. Alimi has since relocated to the UK claiming discrimination and death threats. The first Nigerian lesbian wedding between Judith Ndukwu and Mona Nghixulifwa , a Namibian happened in the Hague, Netherlands ( Beach Club Naturale, Scheveningen) far removed from the prying laws of Nigeria. Judith was the wife while Mona was the husband. Progressively, lesbians in Nigeria have continued to dig in, forcefully entrenching passive acceptance. Last year, the first lesbian documentary, in the country “Under the Rainbow” by Pamela Adie was released to the shock and awe of many people. The documentary according to the theme “ celebrates resilience and the pursuit of happiness and delivers its message as a love letter”.  The documentary is a “visual memoire” about her personal journey of coming home to herself by walking the viewer through her experiences. She came to terms with her sexuality and shared it with her family. She struggled through a marriage, depression, loss, rejection from her family and their attempt to “cure” her of her sexuality. Storytelling, using herself is her own idea of advocacy.

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Married Women and Lesbianism

Quelinsblog.com investigations revealed that there are three key factors that give rise to lesbianism practice among married women in Nigeria. One could be said that those who were born that way. That is, those who have inherent lesbianism instincts; who are attracted to their fellow sex than the opposite. Two are those were influenced to be lesbians through association or peer pressure and the third include those who became lesbians to have more room to express their sexuality because their husbands cannot satisfy them and dating another man might expose them to the unforgiving consequences of infidelity and scandal.

“She came to me and has been staying with me for three days. We have been friends for a long time and she is married with three children. She is a lesbian and I know that. She has been asking me out for a long time but I have resisted her because I am not into it. She will spend all the time praising my body.

“Last night we were sleeping together when I felt her hand creeping into my vagina. I jumped and got up from the bed and took my extra foam and slept on the floor. I didn’t want that to cause quarrel between us because we have come a long way and I wasn’t surprised she did that. She has refused to accept that I am not into it. In the morning she called up one lady and drove to her house. I didn’t see her again for two days. She left after finishing my one bottle of Whisky,” a lady narrated to quelinsblog.com.

Shot of homosexual film in Kenya, Rafiki Film (from CNN)

The Psychology of Lesbianism

WebMD (webmd.com) argues that some people may think that because lesbians aren’t sexually or romantically attracted to men, they hate them. But most lesbians have friendships and professional relationships with men.

Another myth is that one person in a lesbian relationship must take on the role of the man. One partner may play a more traditionally masculine role, but that isn’t necessarily the norm. Each relationship is different. The gender dynamic depends on the specific people involved and how they interact with each other.

There are also stereotypes that lesbians like to wear flannel shirts, or that they are athletic and enjoy playing sports. But you can’t identify a lesbian by what type of clothes they wear or what activities they choose.

In Nigeria, investigations show that many lesbians are married to men and now practice bisexuality but have preference to same sex partner. There is also a growing number of homosexuals who are also married. This is because having children of your own is an obsession in the Nigerian society and homosexuality is not legalized, many in the LGBTQ community would strive to live a normal life.

 

 

About Chinedu Eze

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